View Full Version : Military Branch Bathroom Joke

November 2nd, 2006, 03:42 PM
I was told a joke while I was at the MEPS (can't remember what that stands for, its just a military processing place) about the Air Force but in involves all the branches. It has to do with what the other branches call a bathroom and I can't remember it for the life of me. It goes something like:

The Army calls it the _____, The Navy calls it the _______, the Marine calls it the _______, and guess what the Air Force calls it, The Bathroom.

I know one of the blanks is the 'latrine' but I can't remember which branch that is. Anyone know this joke or can fill in the blanks for me?

EDIT: Alright, based on the information on the recent posts I'm going to go with, "The military has a lot of terminology, for example a bathroom is called many different things. The Navy and the Marines call it the head, the Army calls it the Latrine... Guess what the Air Force calls it, the bathroom" I'm going to go ahead and agree with this, if anyone has any disputes feel free to correct me

If you want to say any more military jokes go ahead but I think I had a thread like this before anyways, so basically thanks for the help guys.

November 2nd, 2006, 03:53 PM
I'm pretty sure Army is 'Latrine' and Navy is 'Head'.

November 2nd, 2006, 04:09 PM
I believe the Marines also call it a "head". "Latrine" is Army.

MEPS stands for Military Entrance Processing Station.

November 2nd, 2006, 05:14 PM
The Marines call it the head because the Marines are the Navy, Just the really, really kick-ass part of it.

November 2nd, 2006, 05:31 PM
Yes and no, they do call it something else also but I don't remember what. They are a Dept. of the Navy though. GOOOOOO Navy!!!!

November 2nd, 2006, 05:31 PM
LOL, Bobbie... reminds me of a bumper sticker I saw the other day. Was something like: "Yes, the Marines are a division of the Navy. The men's division." (FYI, I've had family in every branch of the service except the AF, too, lol)

*duck* And sorry, Wolf, don't know the fill-in-the-blanks there.

November 2nd, 2006, 06:13 PM
There is some significant difference in terminology between the branches.
It's compounded by the fact that they interpret the same phrase differently.

Take "Secure the Building" as an example.

The Marines interpret it as go in and capture (or kill if neccessary) the occupants.

The Air Force interprets it as "Put down a 5 year lease with an option to buy."

November 2nd, 2006, 08:22 PM

Aint Ready for Marines Yet

November 2nd, 2006, 09:33 PM
An Army grunt stands in the rain with a 35 pound pack on his back, 15 pound. weapon in hand, after having marched 12 miles, and says, "This is shit!"

An Army Airborne Ranger stands in the rain with a 45 pound pack on his back, 15 pound weapon in hand, after having jumped from an airplane and marched 18 miles, and says with a smile, "This is good shit!"

A Navy SEAL lies in the mud, 55 pound pack on his back, 15 pound weapon in hand, after having had a 10 mile swim to shore, a five crawl through swamps, and a 25 mile march in jungle, at night, through enemy positions, says with a grin, "This really is great shit."

A Marine, up to his nose in the stinking, bug-infested mud of a swamp with a 65 pound pack on his back and a 15 pound weapon in each hand, after jumping from an aircraft at high altitude, into the ocean, swimming 12 miles to the shore, killing several alligators to enter the swamp, then crawling 30 miles through the brush to assault an enemy camp, says, "I love this shit."

An Air Force NCO sits in an easy chair in an air conditioned, carpeted office and says, "My e-mail's out? What kind of shit is this?"

Clareon Wolfeyes
November 3rd, 2006, 10:11 AM
ROFL! Thats some good @#$%!

November 3rd, 2006, 11:38 AM

November 3rd, 2006, 12:39 PM
When the excrement hits the rotary blades:

an Army corporal is roused out of his bunk at 0400 by his sgt, throws on his uniform out of his foot-locker, grabs his rifle and heads out to formation. In the briefing his officer, a captain, says "give 'em hell soldiers."

a navy seaman is roused out of his bunk by the alarm, throws on his uniform and heads to his station in that submerged tin-can known as a submarine. During the briefing his commander, a captain, says "Give 'em hell sailors."

a marine is kicked out of his bunk at 0200 by his sgt, throws on the muddied uniform he'd taken off just a few hours ago, grabs his rifle and heads to formation. His commander, a captain, says in the situation brief "Give 'em hell marines."

an airman is roused by a call to his pager, showers, shaves, puts on a freshly pressed uniform from his closet, gets in his car and drives to base, stopping at a drive thru for breakfast on the way. He gets to his duty station and preps a jet for take-off. As the pilot approaches he snaps a salute and says "Give 'em hell captain."

November 3rd, 2006, 12:40 PM
Yes and no, they do call it something else also but I don't remember what. They are a Dept. of the Navy though. GOOOOOO Navy!!!!

We call it the head same as ya'll. A lot of our terms are derived from the Navy. For example, Geedunk, head, deck, ladderwell, and lets not forget Scuttlebutt heh

November 3rd, 2006, 03:11 PM
Yeah for waterfountains! er I mean scuttlebutts.

I know ya'll say head, but there was another word ya'll used too or maybe it was just the marines I knew when I was stationed at Iwakuni for 2 months.

November 4th, 2006, 08:11 AM
Must of just been them. We're taught from day 1, bathroom=head, pen=inkstink, running shoes=go fasters :lol:

Oh yeah, Asquith, I got some scuttlebutt to tell ya too :-D

not really

November 4th, 2006, 09:36 AM
hehe, yeah I love that scuttlebutt stands for gossip and a waterfountain.

Everybody loves to gossip 'round the waterhole!